A Little Personal

I couldn’t locate my story for the month of May, but I’m pretty sure I’ve already written the outline and typed some part of it. I’ve searched my email where I keep my stories for backup, but it wasn’t there; so, now I’m milking my brain to write another story to fill this month. I’ve several unfinished stories and several drafts saved in my laptop and I’ve tried reading them but none of them seems to fit my mood, which is very important that they do because if they don’t fit my mood then I won’t be able to give them a good ending or write them the way I want them to be written. I thought of writing a new story but nothing’s coming to my mind; writer’s block, maybe. It’s almost the end of the month and I need to post my story. Then, I remembered that I plan to read Chocolate for a Teen’s Dreams by Kay Allenbaugh; so, I took it from the shelf and read one story last night and another one today. What I read last night didn’t leave an impression, but today’s story certainly did, which is one of the two reasons I’m writing right now, the other reason is that I can’t let this month go by without posting my story. I read Of Horses and Dreams by Catherine Madera; it’s simple but it has a soul. Stories don’t really need to be long and complicated, I realized; they need to have soul because that’s what touches the readers. And, something personal (something close to the writer’s experience) is always considered interesting and it captures the readers’ attention and it makes the writer vulnerable, which is why I’ve decided to write something a little personal. Although, one (and some events) of the stories posted in this site really happened in the writer’s life. Here’s another one.

Franco was my high school suitor. I never really knew what he saw in me that made him fall in love; all I know was that he was the first boy who shed tears over me. It all began one night; I was doing something in the computer when my cousin’s cellphone, which she shared with me and my sister, beeped. It was a message from Franco saying: Can I court you? Since it was the first time that I’ve received such message I didn’t know how to respond to it, so I replied to the message saying: Are you making fun of me? Later on, I realized I wasn’t being made fun of that he was actually serious about pursuing me.
I have this belief that boys shouldn’t be asking girls if they could court them because once the girls said yes, it’s as obvious as saying they like them too and there’s no need for courtship to take place; the challenge is lost. Asking a girl out is risky since the answer is always either Yes or No; boys should take that risk if they’re serious about the girl they want to pursue. So when Franco sent me that message – which is another NO, NO for me because he should be doing it face-to-face and not through technology – I wasn’t impressed at all. Another belief of mine was that courtship should last at least a year in order for the boy to prove his sincerity; although, I’ve long crossed this out from my list of beliefs. In addition to my beliefs, I vowed to finish school before I enter any relationship other than friendship. And, in case I didn’t make it clear, Franco was dumped before he even started. But, he was persistent or should I say in love because he pursued me despite the mentioned obstacles and it lasted for more than a couple of years; he confessed when we were sophomore and continued till early senior. The first time I went out on a real date with him (this was my first date ever) didn’t go well and there was no follow up to it. Most of the courtship took place at school since we were there our entire life. We were paired up in a number for the prom and we danced after that. We became good friends and we’re comfortable with each other. Our friends, even our teachers, were all rooting for us. Franco was a good boy, in fact, I had feelings for him; but I wasn’t ready. I remembered hearing him cry at the back of the classroom as he said to my friend, ‘It’s been a year.’ It makes me laugh whenever I think about it; my silly beliefs were to be blamed. I was also young and didn’t know how to handle love.

During the senior year, he found another love interest, my close friend Abbey; she had had feelings for him even when his world still revolved around me. My Franco, then, realized there was another girl that could exist in his world other than me, and that was Abbey. When I found out she liked him, the Ursula in me awoke; I would play with Franco, literally. I would ride on his back, making him weak again with my embraces. Abbey, who was so into Franco, confronted me and made me realize my mistake and selfishness. I exited the scene and let my close friend Abbey, who wanted nothing else but to be loved by the good boy Franco, who I knew loved me the best he could, be happy and experience the magic of love. They didn’t last long.
After high school, I lost contact with my friends and Franco. Once during college on my way home, we got on the same bus; he saw me and, looking so excited, asked if he could sit with me. I said yes. We talked and found out we were both in a relationship. He had a girlfriend, I had a girlfriend, too; but the spark between us was still there. It’s been years since I received that shocking message; Franco’s married now to our high school friend – not to Abbey; and he’s got a son or daughter, I’m not sure. He’s got a child; while I’m single, still waiting for that someone who would break all my silly beliefs and make me believe in love alone. Maybe Franco was the one, I feel it whenever I think about him and how he loved me; but I took it for granted and now it’s too late. I’ve had my ups and downs in a relationship; it must’ve been really difficult for Franco during his time with me. I feel grateful for the love he’d laid for me. But I’ve no regrets because I know and I believe that someone’s out there created just for me, and if he comes, I’ll be ready.

NOTE: This is one of my treasured stories. I hope you enjoy and learn from it. – Muse

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